Words, words, words

An occasional column on words essential to the survival of a lost Celt in Padania.

Rubrica occasionale di parole essenziali alla sopravvivenza di una celta sperduta in Padania.

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THE CRACK (sost. sing, non contabile)

Potrete pensare da questo titolo che magari i festeggiamenti per il mio compleanno ieri sera abbiano visto l'uso di sostanze illegali. E invece vorrei spiegarvi l'uso celtico di questa parola, che viene, a differenza dalla ben nota sostanza illegale, sempre preceduta dall'articolo determinato "the".

The crack viene dal gaelico craic (pron: appunto, crack) e significa divertimento, festeggiamenti, risate e canti, con gli amici, in gruppo, insieme. Questo sì che c'è stato ieri sera, autentico crack con risate e canti insieme agli amici.

Noi celti sperduti siamo gran consumatori di crack, e ne consigliamo l'uso agli amici italiani, che crediamo predisposti.

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THE CRACK (sing, uncountable noun)

Friends, on reading this word you may be forgiven for thinking that the festivities yesterday evening for my birthday included the use of an illegal substance.

No, no, no.

I would like to draw your attention to the purely Gaelic use of this term, which does not refer to an illegal substance but, always following the definite article, describes that fun, song and laughter together with friends, in company, never alone that is so profoundly a part of our way of life.

From the Gaelic craic, the word that describes the sort of free and legal stuff that yesterday evening was full of.

We lost Celts are great users of the crack and we strongly advise it to our Italian friends, whom we believe to be possessed of a natural disposition for its use.

Phew!

Theatre news:

Non farò più Britney Spears posseduta. Questo onore toccherà a mio collega.

Io invece dovrò subire una salsiccia ficcata in bocca e un aspirapolvere ficcato nell'orecchio, il tutto vestito da uomo indossando dei baffi tipo Groucho Marx.

E sì, questo è uno spettacolo per bambini.

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Theatre news:

I will no longer be playing the part of Britney Spears possessed by an alien. This honour will go to my male colleague.

I will instead have a sausage stuffed in my mouth and a vacuum cleaner stuffed in my lughole, all the while dressed as a man with Groucho Marx moustache.

And yes, this is a show for children.

Studi Biblici

Ho ricevuto questo da un'amica, e non ho idea se sia vera o una bufala, ma poco importa. Per chi legge un pochino l'inglese, vale la pena.

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by an east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet:

Dear Dr. Laura,Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify?
Why can't I own Canadians?I

have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree.Can you settle this?

Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16.
Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted fan,

Jim

Links

Leggete dell'ultima iniziativa di Morgan, non potete dire di no perché si tratta di un bambino.

Altre foto dalla Sicilia (lascio perdere Amato, io ho semplicemente amato...):

Sicilia - Acqua